Good afternoon everyone. It is so nice to be back. I started my journey about 4 years ago. I succeeded. I was at my goal weight, had my dream physique, and even had the perfect lady by my side. She had the biggest influence on my life out of everyone I came in contact with. It was a perfect happy ending. And then came the day after the happy ending... School marks started to drop (about 7% per term in all subjects) I started going to every party and used to drink about 2 bottles a night. I started to get a bad reputation. Started to change for the worst. Had a few too many arguments with my lady, so... she left. I started to drink more. Was about the time I started seeing my psychiatrist. Medication started to become more and more. Comfort eating became an everyday thing. Then I started smoking weed, Once every two weeks became 3 times a day fast. I was the heaviest I had ever been. My mood got worse, and the condition intensified. The medication became more and that made me gain extra weight. Then I started taking Zanor. Was doing a little bit better for about two weeks and then I started saving up so I could take more on another day. 2mg became 4mg and went up to 16 mg. I overdosed. Needed two weeks to recover. I was okay for about half a year and then the long-term damage started to kick in. Started as a small stomach ache and ended with an emergency operation that had me in the ICU for a month. Had to clean out my internals (the infection started to spread between my organs). Had a long and slow recovery (my abb muscles were split in two). No exercise could be done. And I went back to 110kg... exactly where I started.
I did some core and arm exercises since the operation. I am also back on my diet and honestly hoping the third time is the charm. But I am very happy to be able to share my journey here again. Wish you all the best. Will update as I progress.
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102 kg
Lost so far: 0 kg.
Still to go: 27 kg.
Diet followed: Reasonably Well.
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![](https://m.ftscrt.com/static/images/box/membersicon.gif) Comments
So sorry you went through all that. It's tough beating unhealthy coping mechanisms. You'll get through this. Just take it one step at a time.
01 Oct 23 by member: Zorev
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Wow, what a testimony, thank you for being so vulnerable and open about your experiences, this is usually a big part of true healing, when you can share about your painful experience. I know you are going to be successful in your way forward and you will definitely inspire and save many others by what you have learnt from your difficult and challenging walk. Thank you again, I am definitely encouraged and wish you all the best on your journey ahead…🙏🏽💝
02 Oct 23 by member: MariaManoto
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The reason why I like this community so much is because it's more than just my journey and my results, it is our journey, our marathon and if I make it to the finish line before you, you will still hear my voice cheering for you.
I know that weight is a difficult thing, physically and emotionally, but here we will hold you when you slip, catch you when you fall, and encourage you if you gain or lose.
It's lovely for me to share where I came from, my past, and my mistakes, because I remember when I went through it I wanted someone to understand, but now I can be that someone for someone else. Like I said it's not just my journey anymore. One love people❤️
02 Oct 23 by member: J_MBRG
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Sending you strength - as someone who’s been here before and then returned I know this community can be a good support network 💜
02 Oct 23 by member: Pollylock1
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To get the best view, you have to climb the mountain. We are bound to slip at some point but that is par for the course. The view is worth the effort. Your challenges will inspire others. Thank you for sharing🥰😍🙏.
03 Oct 23 by member: Shamjamz
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So true, we walk on our own, but we do not walk alone…🚶🏽♀️👩🏾🦯🚶🏽♂️💪🏽
03 Oct 23 by member: MariaManoto
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Battling depression, and what I would suspect, PTSD. I understand the hardships of switching meds and trying to find the right type as well as the right combination of meds. It’s not easy and it takes a lot of time. Staying on your fitness journey will give you the highs your meds can’t. It’s something to be proud about. Rooting for you!
03 Oct 23 by member: mikokeulder
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Thank you for sharing such a personal story with us. This time will be the charm for you. you have conquered a mountain. You've got this
03 Oct 23 by member: Michellean77
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I would like to thank you all for the comments of motivation, understanding, and strength. These comments serve as a reminder that change... is beautiful.
Today I attempted my first ever 10km walk. It was pretty hard as it was a bit more than double my average. The last Km had me stopping every 200m but after a 30-second break, I stood up and pressed on until I finished the whole 10km.
I am going to post a comment after this one containing a written piece from a writer we lost a while ago, but I believe it will inspire all of you the way it inspired me...
05 Oct 23 by member: J_MBRG
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When I take you to the Valley, you’ll see the blue hills on the left and the blue hills on the right, the rainbow and the vineyards under the rainbow late in the rainy season, and maybe you’ll say, “There it is, that’s it!” But I’ll say. “A little farther.” We’ll go on, I hope, and you’ll see the roofs of the little towns and the hillsides yellow with wild oats, a buzzard soaring and a woman singing by the shadows of a creek in the dry season, and maybe you’ll say, “Let’s stop here, this is it!” But I’ll say, “A little farther yet.” We’ll go on, and you’ll hear the quail calling on the mountain by the springs of the river, and looking back you’ll see the river running downward through the wild hills behind, below, and you’ll say, “Isn’t that the Valley?” And all I will be able to say is “Drink this water of the spring, rest here awhile, we have a long way yet to go and I can’t go without you.
Ursula K. Le Guin
05 Oct 23 by member: J_MBRG
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