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So a long while ago, years now, I was looking at pictures of myself from a family reunion. As I stared at the images of myself I could help but think "My god, what has happened to me." With that thought I said no more and immediately went on a diet. I did really well for a year. I went from about 415lbs to 283lbs. It was very happy with myself.
But then something happened. I don't know if it was the depression that had hit me or what, but my weight began to go back up again. I am now back up to 353lbs and I feel like a bit of a failure for it. I don't want to go back to how I looked. I don't even like that some of my clothes don't fit anymore and I feel like the only pants that will fit me are stretchy ones, even though I know they are not. I want to go back to being able to shop at a regular store for my clothing. Not at the "specialty" store that carry the large sizes.
So I started my diet again. I am back to my calorie counting. I back to monitoring everything that goes into my mouth. I am back to registering everything down to the piece of gum I am chewing, because those have calories too. I will be back down to a weight that I am more comfortable with.
It is more for me than it is for anyone else. I like to think I am a strong person, but sometimes things happen that just tear you down over and over again.
So this is for me. For the person I want to be. To be healthy again in both mind and body. To be happier with what I look like. And to be able to wear that cute dress that is hanging in my closet that I can't zip up anymore.
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3079 kcal
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Fat: 91.00g | Prot: 67.21g | Carbs: 525.74g.
Breakfast: Savia Aloe Vera Drink. Lunch: Bananas, Skippy Natural Creamy Peanut Butter, Country Hearth 12 Grain. Dinner: Ben & Jerry's Stephen Colbert's Americone Dream Vanilla Ice Cream with Fudge Covered Waffle Cone Pieces & a Caramel Swirl, Rotini, Corn On The Cob with Butter. Snacks/Other: Dean's Lemonberry Sherbet, Bolthouse Farms Tropical Goodness Smoothie. more...
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6418 kcal
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Exercise:
Driving - 3 hours, Watching TV/Computer - 13 hours, Resting - 1 hour, Sleeping - 7 hours. more...
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 Comments
You can't make this change for anyone else but yourself. It has to be for you and you alone.
20 Aug 15 by member: LoadGod
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It is for me. It is because I want to be happy with myself. Sometimes that includes not hearing the negative things that people say to me. And sometimes making it so that there isn't anything to say. I try to have a thick skin, but sometimes it is hard.
20 Aug 15 by member: -E-M-
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Having been tjere myself, all of my life, id just like to say, keep trying, never give up, if only for health reasons, and just take one day at a titi witj short term achievable goals along the way. We can get there ttogethe, and just moving in the right direction has to be enought. Even a plateau is a win gor not gaining. I support you.
20 Aug 15 by member: jferg1949
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20 Aug 15 by member: -E-M-
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You can do it.haters and criticizers will always be there.just be patient and focused.You did it once you can do it again.
20 Aug 15 by member: UmmBilal
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You already know what to do, so it won't be long before you're back in that cute dress! Good luck!
20 Aug 15 by member: lettygaylor
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I admire your courage. Remember to be kind to yourself. That same support and love we give each other on this site, we need to give back to ourselves. All the very best to you today.
20 Aug 15 by member: Sunshine99
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Listen at least you caught it at 353 and didn't let it creep up to 415 again that is a huge plus!! You can do it!!! Don't let anybody bring you down. We have all gone wrong in one way or another 🌻🌻
20 Aug 15 by member: poohle
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